Monday, January 7, 2019

Big Dick Nick does it again!

Big Dick Nick (aka "Nick Foles") came through in the clutch again yesterday.  He threw a go-ahead touchdown with a minute remaining, and the Philadelphia Eagles defeated the Chicago Bears by a score of 16-15.  In my opinion, the outcome of the game was never in doubt.  For God's sake, the Eagles have a quarterback named Big Dick Nick.  The Bears have a quarterback named Mitch.  Go ask 100 guys on the street which team would win based on nothing but the names of the two quarterbacks.  All 100 of those guys will pick the Eagles. 

Now you're probably saying, "But Massler, the Bears only lost because Cody Parkey missed a field goal at the end of the game."  That may be true, but it’s also true that Cody Parkey was distracted BECAUSE he was thinking about Big Dick Nick’s enormous dick.  What else would be going through his mind during such a pivotal moment?  If I were good with Photoshop, I’d show you how that went down.

Anyway, here are the highlights: 

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